# BEAM · THE 8+ PROGRAM · upgrade scripts (KILLPAGES-E, 27 Oct) · scripts only, no code until approved

The bar (_tools/8PLUS_PROGRAM.md): every kill 8 or more on BRUTALITY, CINEMATIC, SCRIPT and ANIMATION DETAIL. The worst
kills go first, from page 62's baseline (_tools/scores/beam.json: average 4.9 / 5.2 / 6.6 / 4.3).

**Rules for every script below:**
- **The beam:** a half-second pink charge (a tap under 0.5 s is the real cancel), then one instant line that cooks through
  everything in its path, and the knockback.
- **The beam's own wound (HFX v2 'burn' plus our own tunnel interior):**
  - a charred black rim and a blistered pink ring;
  - cooked tunnel walls, with whatever the line went through visible inside (rib, lung, vertebra, brain);
  - an exit that is wider and torn, steam and smoke rising out of both ends;
  - cauterised, so the blood comes from what the burn did not seal.
- **Faces:** XT and VH the d58W dead face; H is d58D on a lit victim; M is X; L is alive, out cold, with stars; VL is alive,
  in its own picture (no puff).
- **Headgear and framing:** face-covering headgear comes off at XT, VH and H. Faris is at most an edge of a final.
- **Length:** 15.0 s from the trigger to the held final, the freeze included.
- **Cinema kit:** INGREDIENTS, NOT RULES. Across beam's 30 kills, a kit device goes in about 1 kill in 6. This first batch
  has the four worst stagings, so it carries four of them (a fig stamp, a split 2, an orbit 3d, a bullet-cam). The rest of
  the weapon uses the shell's own camera language.

---

## BATCH 1 (6): DEAD SEA, MILKY SEA, TRENCH COAT, DEATH SPIRAL, BLEACHED, SHEETS

### 1 · beam.dead-sea · DEAD SEA (RARE, The Deep) · now 4 / 3 / 4 / 3
**Audit:** "a fact, not a story". The brine lake is never established, the body is hard to read, and it ends on a static float.

**Core:** the lake at the bottom of the sea is a mirror. The beam comes 25 m straight down, goes through him, and the lake
throws it straight back up through him: one shot, two lines.

**Hook:** he finds a lake inside the sea, sees a second him looking up out of it, and walks out on it laughing.

**Beats:**
- **LEAD:** under the wreck he turns tail and kicks down into the dark, firing back up; his slow rounds crawl past Faris.
- **0.0-1.2 THE DESCENT:** head first past the kelp into the black, motes streaming up past the lens, a dead fish drifting
  down beside him.
- **1.2-2.4 THE LAKE:**
  - The seabed opens on a glassy lake with a pale mist line for a surface, a rim of black mussels and belly-up crabs.
  - The fish lands ON the lake and lies there.
  - He hangs over it and sees himself looking up: the lake is a mirror. He waves; it waves.
- **2.4-3.6 WALKING ON WATER:**
  - A foot on it: it dents like a skin and holds.
  - He stands bobbing, arms out, and walks on the lake at the bottom of the sea, laughing bubbles.
  - His reflection walks under him, upside down.
- **3.6-4.2 THE STAR:** 25 m up under the hull a pink point blooms. The whine comes down muffled; he looks up, and the
  reflection looks down.
- **4.2 THE LINE:**
  - Straight down through him, from the left collarbone to the right hip, into the lake.
  - The lake throws it back up through him: in under the jaw, out through the crown.
  - A V of light; the brine boils white along both lines.
- **4.2-5.2 FIG. 1 (kit: freezeStamp 'fig'):**
  - The frame freezes and grades blueprint cyan.
  - A textbook diagram inks itself over him: the ray in, the normal, the ray out, the two angle arcs.
  - The caption: "FIG. 1 · THE ANGLE OF INCIDENCE EQUALS THE ANGLE OF REFLECTION".
- **5.2-8.0 HE FLOATS (COORD 05:05: the final does not hinge on his reflection; reflections are fists THE MIRROR's):**
  - He folds and drops onto the lake and floats (nothing sinks in brine), face up, arms out.
  - The boiled brine clouds the surface under him, so there is no mirror picture.
  - The second beam's scorch line runs across the lake surface back to him: a black seared stripe, still steaming, from where
    the line struck the lake to his body.
  - Boiled-brine plumes rise out of both tunnels; the fish lies beside his hand.

**Shots:**
- a falling follow on the descent;
- a wide that establishes the lake (the mist line, the crab rim);
- a low across the surface with him and his reflection split by the mist line;
- a close on his face meeting his own eyes;
- a tilt up the 25 m to the pink star;
- the line top to bottom in one frame;
- the FIG freeze;
- a slow rolled push along the scorch line on the lake to the floating body.

**Gore ladder:**
- **XT:** two cooked tunnels crossing in an X, the exits steaming; the seared line on the lake leads back to him.
  - The down-line: a charred rim, a blistered pink ring, cooked brown walls, the lung inside glowing orange and cooling.
  - The up-line: under the jaw and out through the crown. The scalp is split, the skull edge white, the cooked grey brain
    in the exit.
  - Brine boils out of both tunnels. The eyes are boiled egg-white, the lips drawn back off the teeth.
  - Blood can't sink: it spreads ON the lake round him like dark oil. d58W.
- **VH:** he ducked, so the bounce misses. One tunnel, collarbone to hip, smoking. He floats face down on the boiled brine
  (rolled close), d58W.
- **H:** the down-line takes the arm at the shoulder, and the arm floats beside him. He kneels on the lake holding the
  cauterised stump, d58D, lit by the boiling brine. Insert.
- **M:** knocked flat on the lake, a burnt stripe across his chest, X eyes. Medium.
- **L:** the line strikes the lake beside him; the mirror flash blinds him; he faints and floats on his back. Stars.
- **VL:** alive. The lake bounces him like a trampoline, and he kicks away up into the blue, waving at his reflection.

**Detail:**
- a live reflection: the bodies redrawn mirrored under the mist line, clipped to the lake;
- slow surface waves, the mussel rim shell by shell, the crabs' legs, the dead fish;
- brine plumes;
- the tunnels: HFX burn plus our own interiors (lung, skull, brain);
- his delighted face in the mirror;
- the light: the pink star overhead, the lake's pale glow, the cyan blueprint freeze.

### 2 · beam.milky-sea · MILKY SEA (EPIC, The Deep) · now 4 / 4 / 5 / 3
**Audit:** the sea glow is pretty but abstract, with murky frames, a long black beat, a static close and vague gore.

**Core:** in the black water every move lights the sea, so he keeps perfectly still. His heart doesn't: every beat sparks the
plankton against his throat.

**Hook:** he swims into the black to hide, and each kick leaves a glowing wake behind him.

**Beats:**
- **LEAD:** under the hull he loses Faris in the gloom and slips into the black.
- **0.0-1.4 THE WAKE:** he swims, and each kick leaves a blue-green trail. He looks back, sees it, and stops dead; it fades.
  Silence.
- **1.4-2.6 THE SWEEP:** Faris's charge glow taps the dark (each tap under half a second, the real cancel), a pink circle
  sliding past him in the water.
- **2.6-3.6 THE PULSE:**
  - At his throat, a faint blue blip, then another: his heartbeat, sparking the plankton against his skin.
  - He clamps a hand over it, and the light leaks between his fingers.
  - It beats faster as the pink glow turns toward him (an insert cut on the throat and his eyes, his cheeks puffed).
- **3.6-4.1 THE CHARGE:** the glow stops on the blip; the real half-second charge, the whine muffled.
- **4.1 THE LINE:**
  - Through his hand and his throat.
  - The flash sets off the whole sea: a ring of blue-green light races out over the hull, the kelp and the seabed, a milky
    sea. In it he is already hit.
  - The pulse stops.
- **4.1-7.0 THE SPECKS:** he sinks slowly; the plankton settle on him and outline him in blue-green specks. The cooked hole
  glows orange in the blue, and his blood clouds black in the glow.

**Shots:**
- a slow side track on the swim, the wake trailing;
- a close as he freezes;
- the dark wide with the pink taps sliding past;
- the throat insert (a plain cut);
- a crash on the line;
- the milky flash wide (the one picture of the whole set);
- a slow push onto the sinking outline;
- a rolled final close.

**Gore ladder:**
- **XT:**
  - The hand is holed through the palm: a charred ring, the finger bones in the hole.
  - The throat is cooked open in a tunnel, the windpipe rings and a white vertebra inside the charred channel. The head lolls
    back on what's left.
  - His last air streams out of the throat hole, not the mouth.
  - The blood leaves the neck in plumes that the plankton light from inside: red-black clouds with blue edges. d58W.
- **VH:** through the chest at the heart, the cooked chambers in the tunnel. He sinks face down, outlined in specks. Rolled
  close.
- **H:** through the shoulder. He drifts, d58D, lit by the milky glow. Insert.
- **M:** a burnt stripe, X eyes, sinking. Medium.
- **L:** a miss; the milky flash dazzles him; he faints drifting, stars made of plankton specks.
- **VL:** alive. His pulse calms, the taps slide past, and he swims off, his wake writing a glowing smile.

**Detail:**
- plankton specks (hash-placed, cheap) and the pulse glow;
- the hand over the throat leaking light;
- the throat anatomy;
- blood clouds lit from inside;
- the hull, kelp and seabed in the flash;
- the face: wide eyes, puffed cheeks, a bubble escaping.

### 3 · beam.skin-camo · TRENCH COAT (EPIC skin) · now 3 / 4 / 7 / 3
**Audit:** a funny setup (two short men in one long coat), but the two men are never revealed, and there's little blood.

**Core:** the line goes through the middle button, where the two men meet, and gets them both: one through the head, the
other through the legs.

**Hook:** a very tall stranger in a long camo coat walks past Faris, and Faris tips his hat.

**Beats:**
- **0.0 THE STRANGER:** collar up, hat low, a huge fake moustache, a stiff sway.
- **1.0 THE TIP:**
  - Faris tips his hat. The stranger tips his: it wobbles.
  - A small hand pokes out of the middle of the coat to steady it, and pulls back in.
- **1.8 THE BUTTON:** Faris lets him pass, then looks at the middle of the coat. Between two buttons, an eye looks back out at
  him. It blinks.
- **2.4 THE CHARGE:** the cannon comes up at the button. The eye widens; the coat starts to hurry.
- **2.9 THE LINE + SPLIT 2 (kit, frozen 0.9 s):**
  - Left panel: the top man's face under the hat, the moustache slipping.
  - Right panel: the eye in the button gap with the line in it.
- **3.0 THE HALVES:**
  - The coat burns open along the line and falls apart in two.
  - The top man topples backwards off the bottom man's shoulders. His calves are cut off at the line and stay in the lower
    half with the boots.
  - The bottom man stands a beat, smoke pouring out of both eye sockets, then drops to his knees and onto his face.
- **4.0 THE STUMPS:**
  - On his back, the top man lifts his head and looks at his legs ending at the calves. He reaches for his friend, and dies.
  - The moustache floats down onto his chest; the hat rolls a circle and settles.
- The old drop down the lift shaft is replaced.

**Shots:**
- a low tracking side shot of the stranger passing;
- the hat-tip two-shot with the little hand;
- a crash onto the eye in the button gap;
- the charge over Faris's shoulder;
- SPLIT 2;
- the halves falling (the shell's own slow motion);
- a low push to the two-shot final.

**Gore ladder:**
- **XT:**
  - The bottom man: in through the left eye (the eye cooked out, a charred socket), a tunnel through the cooked grey brain,
    the back of the skull blown open (bone flecks, a scalp flap). He lies face down in the open coat, the exit hole smoking.
  - The top man: both calves cut through below the knee. Two charred round stumps with the white shin-bone ends and rings of
    cooked muscle; the lower legs lie in the coat with the boots.
  - The coat burns along its cut edge.
  - The final: the two of them in one close, the top man's d58W face up, the moustache on his chest.
- **VH:** the line through the bottom man's eye and the top man's knees, the legs folding the wrong way. The coat drops in a
  heap. A rolled close on the bottom man's dead face in the opened coat, the burnt knees beside it.
- **H:** the line through the bottom man's shoulder; the coat splits and both tumble. He is d58D, lit by the burning coat
  edge. Insert.
- **M:** the coat falls open, both men down, X eyes.
- **L:** the line burns the hat off; the coat panics into a wall, and both men are out cold, stars.
- **VL:** alive. The coat splits and the two men run opposite ways; the moustache hangs in the air, and Faris catches it and
  wears it.

**Detail:**
- the camo coat (pattern, buttons, cloth burning along the cut with glowing edges and curling char);
- the fake moustache, the little hand, the eye in the gap;
- both faces;
- the stump anatomy;
- smoke from the eye sockets.
- **Headgear:** Chotu's headband is off at XT, VH and H; the hat is a prop.

### 4 · beam.skin-ice · DEATH SPIRAL (LEGENDARY skin) · now 4 / 5 / 6 / 3
**Audit:** a fair idea, but a cold image with almost no wound, the final close cropped and a flat face.

**Core:** the figure-skating death spiral, taken literally. Her frozen head skims the ice, and every turn grinds a little more
of her face away.

**Hook:** the ice line freezes her through and the floor into a rink round them, and Faris skates in to take her hand.

**Beats:**
- **0.0 THE ICE LINE:** frozen through the shoulder and chest; frost races out from her feet into a glassy rink.
- **0.8:** she topples rigid. Faris glides in, bows, takes her frozen hand. A waltz starts.
- **2.0 THE SPIRAL:** he pivots on one blade and swings her low into the death spiral, her head skimming the ice.
  - Turn 1: a white scratch.
  - Turn 2: the frost scrapes off her cheek, pink.
  - Turn 3, faster: a red spiral drawn on the ice by her face; her frozen arm creaks at the shoulder.
- **4.6 THE FACE:** a passing close on the ground side of her face.
- **5.0 THE SNAP:** the arm snaps at the frosted shoulder. She slides away spinning across the rink, the red spiral behind
  her, and stops in the middle.
- **6.0 THE BOW:** Faris glides on holding her arm like a partner's hand, and bows to the empty arena. The waltz ends.

**Shots:**
- the frost racing out (a low wide);
- the glide in (tracking);
- the spiral as an ORBIT 3D round the pair (kit: the parallax swing makes the turn read as real);
- a punch-in on her scraping face each turn;
- a crash on the snap;
- the slide in slow motion;
- the bow wide;
- the final close.

**Gore ladder:**
- **XT:**
  - Her face up on the ice. One half is intact and frozen, with a d58W eye.
  - The other half is ground flat to the skull: frozen muscle fibres, the white cheekbone and the side teeth showing, frost
    crystals in the wound.
  - The shoulder stump: a red frozen core and the white bone.
  - The red spiral on the ice round her; the arm in Faris's hand at the frame edge.
- **VH:** after the snap she slides into the boards, and the frozen body cracks across the chest: a red frozen core in the
  crack. A rolled close on her d58W face under the frost.
- **H:** no grinding. The spiral stops and she lies frozen, white skin, blue lips, d58D, lit by the rink lights. Insert.
- **M:** dropped mid-spiral, frozen X eyes. Medium.
- **L:** she thaws, dizzy from the spin, and sits on the ice, out cold, stars.
- **VL:** alive. She thaws, takes his hand, and they skate off in a pairs pose.

**Detail:**
- ice with skate scratches and the bodies reflected faintly;
- frost ferns;
- the ground-face anatomy;
- the frozen shoulder in cross-section;
- Faris's skating poses;
- the arena lights.

### 5 · beam.mid-bleached · BLEACHED (MID) · now 3 / 5 / 6 / 4
**Audit:** chalk-white with thin cracks and a few chips. The flaking never happens, and it ends as a small standing figure.
The old chalk outline is dropped (handcannon CRIME SCENE has one).

**Core:** the flash takes his colour, and with it his skin. He flakes away like old paint, and underneath he is raw.

**Beats (2.9 s):**
- **0.0:** the line passes, in a white flash.
- **0.1:** every colour drains out of him: chalk-white. He looks at his white hands.
- **0.6:** he moves, and cracks race over him like dried paint.
- **0.9:** chips fall from the top down.
  - The scalp flakes off: the red muscle and the white skull.
  - The face comes off in plates: the skinless face, the eyes in raw sockets, the teeth.
- **1.6:** the chest plates fall: the ribcage, the organs wet red inside, the heart beating once.
- **2.2:** he stands flayed, red and white, in a drift of white paint chips.
- **2.5:** he drops into the drift.

**Shots:** a medium on the bleach; a close on the face as it flakes (the hold); a tilt down the body; a low on him dropping
into the chips.

**Gore ladder:**
- **XT:** flayed top to bottom as above, held big. The heart beats once in the opened ribs, and the bleached eyes stay in the
  skinless face.
- **VH:** flaked to the waist, he topples. A close on the skinless face.
- **H:** only the face flakes off: the skinless face, d58D, lit.
- **M:** bleached stiff, he cracks and topples whole, X eyes.
- **L:** bleached pale, he faints, stars.
- **VL:** alive. His colours seep back and he grins.

**Detail:**
- paint-chip sprites (baked and cached) and a crack network;
- muscle layers (the face, the neck);
- the ribcage and organs, with wet highlights.

### 6 · beam.sheets · SHEETS (LEGENDARY) · now 4 / 6 / 6 / 3
**Audit:** a fair ghost-story idea, but no wound anatomy: a face framed in a burnt hole and a red soak.

**Core:** a ghost story with bedsheets, and she ends as the ghost: her face printed in blood through the sheet that covers
her.

**Hook:** at night in a hard wind she hides among white sheets on a washing line, and the moon puts her shadow on one of them.

**Beats:**
- **0.0 THE WASHING LINE:** she inks a line between two posts hung with five white sheets, and ducks behind them.
- **0.8 GHOSTS:**
  - The sheets billow and snap. Faris walks in among them with the cannon.
  - Every sheet that lifts is a false scare: a flapping sleeve, a cat.
- **2.6 THE SHAPE:** the moon puts her shadow on the last sheet, crouched, a hand over her mouth.
- **3.2 THE ROW:** Faris steps back until all five sheets line up between him and the shadow.
- **3.6 THE CHARGE:** the pink glow shows through all five sheets. The shadow sees it and freezes.
- **3.9 THE LINE + BULLET-CAM (kit):** the camera rides the line through the five sheets. Each hole flashes open with a burning
  rim, and the line goes into the shadow and through her mouth.
- **4.4 THE FALL:** the row of holes smokes. The last sheet wraps her as she falls back, and she lands under it.
- **5.0 THE PRINT:**
  - The blood soaks up through the linen: first a dark circle at the mouth, then the eye sockets, then the nose.
  - Her face prints itself in red on the sheet, like a shroud.
  - The wind lifts a corner.

**Shots:**
- low among the sheets;
- the false-scare cuts;
- a close on the shadow;
- the row lining up (a wide from behind Faris);
- the bullet-cam through the holes;
- the fall;
- a rolled push down onto the printed sheet.

**Gore ladder:**
- **XT:**
  - Through her open mouth and out of the back of the skull: the teeth shattered and cooked, the tongue burnt away, the
    palate holed, the back of the head blown open.
  - Her face is printed in blood through the sheet (sockets, nose, mouth). Her real mouth shows through the burnt hole.
  - Under the hem, her hand: the fingers that covered her mouth are charred at the ends. d58W.
- **VH:** through the chest. She is wrapped in the sheet and hangs in it, pegged at the corners (not by the neck), a red ring
  spreading round the hole, her dead face in the opening (the old XT becomes the VH). Rolled close.
- **H:** through the shoulder. She sits against the post wrapped in the sheet, d58D, lit by the moon. Insert.
- **M:** knocked flat under a sheet, X eyes peeking out.
- **L:** the line burns the line; she faints, stars, and a sheet settles over her like a ghost costume.
- **VL:** alive. She pops up with a sheet over her head, a cartoon ghost, "BOO!", and runs off.

**Detail:**
- billowing cloth with folds, pegs and moon-lit translucency;
- burn holes with glowing embers and curling char;
- the blood soak printing a face (soak blobs in a face mask);
- the mouth anatomy;
- the wind.

**My target scores for batch 1:** 8 / 8 / 8 / 8 each (DEAD SEA script 9: the mirror lake and the bounce).

## BATCH 2 (6): SIESTA, SING-ALONG, TINFOIL, NO TELL, HALO, GRAB (worst first after batch 1; written 27 Oct after LESSONS 1-3)
Rules applied to every one: the XT wound dominates and breaks the outline; the dead face upright (camera rolled if he lies on his
side); costume off at XT/VH (hats, visors, the halo is the exception: it is the story's prop and sits BEHIND the wound in depth);
no rings, discs, spokes or even rows; nothing floating in frame f; ELOOK rim/shadow/soak/tear on the body; blood v2.1 pools.
Devices this batch (ingredients, ~2 in 6): RACK FOCUS (SIESTA), DOLLY ZOOM (NO TELL). The rest are cut and staged plainly.

### 7 · beam.skin-classic · SIESTA (classic skin) · now 5 / 5 / 5 / 4
**Core (kept):** Faris never wakes up: he kills in his sleep, the snore bubble intact.
**Beats:** the dusk nap, the bubble swelling and shrinking · Chotu tiptoes in with a knife, a twig snaps, the bubble wobbles and holds ·
he raises the knife over Faris's head · still snoring, Faris slides the cannon back over his shoulder without lifting the hat ·
the pink comes up on Chotu's belly; he looks down at it · THE LINE through his belly and up through his chest (the barrel points up
and back) · he stays standing a beat, the knife still up, smoke coming out of the hole in his front · he topples backwards into the
saloon dirt · the ash of his shirt comes down like snow on Faris, who brushes his hat in his sleep and rolls over; the bubble pops only
at the very end.
**Shots:** a low two-shot along the barrel (the bubble and the knife in one frame) · RACK FOCUS from the bubble (sharp, foreground) to
Chotu's face behind it as the pink lights his belly · the line in one frame · a slow push down onto him on his back with Faris asleep in
the soft foreground.
**Gore ladder:** XT: on his back, the line's exit burned open through his chest and the front of his shirt burned away round it: a
ragged cooked crater the size of his torso's width, the ribs splintered outward at the rim, the lungs cooked inside, steam; the dead
face upright with eyes half open, the knife still in his fist. VH: through the belly, a cooked tunnel, the face d58W, the knife fallen.
H: the line clips his side, cauterised, d58D in the dusk light (insert). M: he drops flat, X eyes, the knife stuck in the barrel. L: the
line burns his hat off; he faints, stars. VL: Faris snores him off: the line misses, he runs, the bubble never pops.
**Detail:** the snore bubble (wet, refracting), straw hat weave, ash flakes, the cooked crater (rib ends uneven, a wet dark centre).

### 8 · beam.mid-sing-along · SING-ALONG (MID) · now 3 / 6 / 7 / 3
**Core (kept):** he sings along with the charge whine and the line cuts his top note off.
**Beats (2.9 s):** chin up, mocking, note for note with the whine, higher · the top note: mouth wide · THE LINE goes in through the open
mouth and out of the back of the neck · the note stops dead: total silence · he stands a beat, mouth still open on it, smoke curling
OUT of his mouth like breath · he folds to his knees and down on his side.
**Shots:** the singing close with the notes (as now) · a hard close INTO the open mouth on the silence (the hold) · a low medium on the
fold.
**Gore ladder:** XT: the mouth blown open into a cooked cavity: the lower teeth broken, the tongue gone, the palate burned through to
the dark, the cheeks split at the corners up toward the ears, the back of the neck open; held big, his face upright, eyes rolled up.
VH: through the throat under the open mouth, the jaw slack, d58W. H: through the cheek, a cauterised channel, d58D. M: he drops
mid-note, X eyes. L: the line singes his hair; his voice cracks; he faints, stars. VL: he hits the note, the line misses, he takes a bow.
**Detail:** the cavity anatomy (teeth broken unevenly, the split corners), smoke threads, his throat working before the note.

### 9 · beam.mid-tinfoil · TINFOIL (MID) · now 3 / 6 / 6 / 4
**Core (kept):** a tinfoil hat to block the beam.
**Beats:** he taps the foil hat at Faris, smug; the charge light glints on it · the line goes in under the brim through his eye socket
(the hat does nothing) · the foil sizzles and melts DOWN over his face like hot wax · he stands a beat, the molten foil sealing his
eye and running down his cheek, the skin blistering at its edge · he falls on his back.
**Shots:** the smug tap close · the glint · the line · a big close on the melting foil (held) · his fall from above.
**Gore ladder:** XT: the foil melted over the upper face: a silver crust sealed over one eye, its molten edge crawling down the cheek
with the skin blistered and split under it; the other eye socket burned through by the line, the back of the skull open; face upright,
the mouth slack. VH: through the forehead under the brim, the foil scorched, d58W. H: through the shoulder, the hat knocked off, d58D.
M: the foil crumples over his eyes, he falls, X eyes. L: the foil heats, he yelps and faints, stars. VL: the foil reflects a sliver of
the line back and singes Faris's crown; Mikku runs off smug.
**Detail:** molten foil (crinkle facets, silver drips with highlights), blisters, the burned socket.

### 10 · beam.skin-taped · NO TELL (taped skin) · now 5 / 4 / 6 / 5
**Core (kept):** he dodges by reading the glow, so Faris tapes the muzzle black.
**Beats:** he reads the glow and dives clear of the first line, taps his eye · Faris tears tape strip after strip and wraps the muzzle ·
Amjad crouches, bouncing, staring at the black muzzle · DOLLY ZOOM on his face as he realises there will be no tell · the line comes
through the tape with no warning, through his chest in mid-bounce · he lands still coiled and topples · the tape burns off the muzzle in
a curl.
**Shots:** the dive (wide) · tape closes · his eyes on the black muzzle · the dolly zoom · the line · a low on the topple · the final with
his face and the open chest both in frame.
**Gore ladder:** XT: the chest burned open across: the ribs cut and charred at their ends, the lungs and the heart cooked in the cavity,
the skin peeled back round it in torn flaps; he lies on his side, the camera rolled so the dead face (eyes still wide, still watching
for a glow) is upright beside the wound. VH: through the belly, a cooked tunnel, d58W. H: the shoulder, d58D under the cage lights.
M: dropped mid-bounce, X eyes. L: the line burns the tape and his eyebrows; he faints, stars. VL: he dodges the second line too and
taps his eye again.
**Detail:** the tape (torn strips, shine, the burn curl), the cage, the chest anatomy.

### 11 · beam.skin-neon · HALO (neon skin) · now 5 / 5 / 6 / 4
**Core (kept):** his neon halo arrives early and gives away his hiding place.
**Beats:** the dive behind the barrels; the buzzing neon halo lights up over him · he swats it, crawls, throws his jacket over it: it
glows through · he stands and grabs it to smash it, out in the open · THE LINE through his face (between his hands, under the halo) ·
he goes over backwards; the halo, let go, floats down and settles over his head, buzzing, flickering on the burnt skull.
**Shots:** the reveal over the barrels (as now) · the crawl · the grab · the line · a slow push from the barrels to his face under the
settling halo.
**Gore ladder:** XT: the face burned through from the bridge of the nose down: the nose gone, the upper teeth bared in a cooked hole,
the cheekbones white, the eyes boiled under half lids, smoke; the halo flickers BEHIND the head (a backlight, never in front of the
wound). VH: through the chest, d58W, the halo settling. H: the shoulder, d58D lit pink by the halo. M: X eyes, the halo sparks out.
L: the halo shorts, he gets a shock and faints, stars. VL: he smashes the halo and runs.
**Detail:** the neon tube (glass, the plug, flicker), the cooked face anatomy, pink light on the body.

### 12 · beam.grab · GRAB · now 6 / 4 / 6 / 5
**Core (kept):** he grabs the barrel to shove it away and the beam runs up both his arms.
**Beats:** the lunge; both hands on the barrel · the wrestle, the glow building between his fingers (in close) · it fires: the light
crawls up both arms under the skin, the skin splitting along the line from the palms to the shoulders · it meets in his chest · he
lets go and stands with his arms out, smoking · he drops to his knees and onto his face is NOT the end: he drops to his knees and
falls back against the wall.
**Shots:** the hands on the barrel in close as the glow builds · a tilt up the arms as the light crawls (cut the long static hold) · the
chest · a medium on him sitting against the wall.
**Gore ladder:** XT: both forearms stripped to smoking bone (radius and ulna, the hand bones black at the fingertips), the upper arms
split open along the line, the chest burned through where the two lines met; sitting against the wall, his dead face upright, mouth
open. VH: the forearms flayed, the chest holed, d58W. H: the palms and wrists cauterised, d58D. M: thrown back, X eyes, smoking hands.
L: a shock up the arms, his hair stands up, he faints, stars. VL: he lets go with burnt fingertips, blows on them and runs.
**Detail:** the light under the skin (a glowing vein line), the split skin edges, the bones, the smoke off the arms.

**My target scores for batch 2:** 8 / 8 / 8 / 8 each.